I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize