And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
