Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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