I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
