If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize
