Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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