It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Randomize
