i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Randomize
