She said her name was "party"
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
