Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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