i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
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