last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
The Olympian is in my bed
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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