i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
