carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
