So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
