What did we do last night that was yellow?
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
