Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
