Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
