Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
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