It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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