Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
