I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
