stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
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