I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Randomize
