there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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