But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
