I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
