Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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