i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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