how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
