just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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