If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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