you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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