You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Randomize
