This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
