How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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