its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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