Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
