My friends, they love my intelligence
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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