I think I died a long time ago.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
