And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
