You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize
