Plan B is the new Plan A
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Randomize
