So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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