Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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