Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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