last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
