Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Randomize
