Christians are straight up FREAKS
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
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