you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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